Friday, July 15, 2011

Scenic Route.

I'm standing close to a huge intersection in my life. And while I know either road will take me to the next adventure (my new job) the two routes are so very different.

There is the anxiety ridden route. It looks like a gigantic city with one-ways and stop lights and dark clouds. And my GPS is broke.

Then there is the slightly curvy, partly-sunny country back road. This way looks so much more appealing. I want to choose this path, but I'm worried my mind will steer me towards the other.


I have been striving (and mostly succeeding) in living a happier life since we moved. One where I stop worrying about things I cannot control as soon as the thought crosses my mind; where I truly soak in moments and am fully present in them instead of halfway thinking about tomorrow's troubles like I used to spend all of my time doing.

I keep busy. If I'm not busy I go for a walk. I'm not killing myself working out nor beating myself up about it when I don't exercise like I told myself I should be. I'm only human. I am mindful of what I put in my body.

I'm trying to be happy with what I have, instead of constantly focusing on what I want. Do I need these things? That always cuts the list in half.

I dream again; day dream of things I want to do and places and I want to go. I use this lovely site called Pinterest to organize these dreams. Even if I don't get to them all, it is great to have hopes again.


I want to be great at my new job, not just good. I spent the last 3 years stagnant in a job I tolerated for a paycheck. This is my chance to do some interesting and something I might actually enjoy doing every day to boot.

I am choosing the sunny road, not the complicated city streets shrouded in black clouds. I am choosing to be happy, mindful and (sometimes stupidly, but oh well)optimistic.

I'm taking the scenic route on this one, and I'm going to enjoy the ride.

Thursday, July 7, 2011

Note to self.

Remember this.

The feeling.

The absolutely ecstatic rush of finally getting something you've wanted very badly for a very long time.

I've been offered a fantastic new job. And I've accepted it. And tomorrow when my boss (hopefully) isn't out sick anymore I will be handing in my letter of resignation.

I haven't felt this excited/scared/happy/anxious in a really long time.