Tuesday, August 25, 2009


Yesterday I was excited.

Today I am so exhausted I just want to cry, but I'm too exhausted to cry.

I need solid, dreamless sleep and I doubt I'm going to get that before next week.

Not really stressed or worried just really, ridiculously exhausted at this point.

Maybe since I'm off work starting tomorrow I will sleep better.

Thursday, August 20, 2009

Success with 9 days to go

I. Have. A. Dress. (!)

Its gorgeous and a bit too much (and definitely not the Drama Dress, but c'est la vie) but at this point, I wanted a bit too much ;)

I'm holding off on posting it here until after the wedding, so you'll just have to check back!

Now I can fully focus on other wedding related nonsense for the next 9 days.

Thursday, August 13, 2009

Can't Hardly Wait.

(Remember that movie? I haven't seen it in years but now I want to...)

16 days.

I've been teetering back and forth from excited to upset a lot this week....mostly due to PMS but also because I have 16 days to work out lots of things for w-day and we have about $140 to make non-food wedding purchases with...and to live on until next Friday.
And I'm scheduled for a hair cut and color Saturday at 11:30 and thats $65. I was going to get the old eyebrows waxed too, but I think I'll have to cheat on my stylist and go to Regis at the mall so I can shamefully put it on my Visa.

But still, I can't freaking wait until the 29th.
To be married (!)
To be surrounded by all the people who are important to us.
To see people I haven't seen in a long-ass time.
To meet Fiancé's out of state friend from college and to have him meet my oldest friend who lives in Chicago now (hopefully he makes it)
To have a sense of accomplishment that we did it.
To spend an entire week relaxing.

There was a time in my life I honestly didn't think I would ever be doing this, but I've never been happier and I feel more like myself than I ever have in my 24 years and 11 months of living.

Friday, August 7, 2009

22 Days and Still No Dress

This week brought a new development in my dress drama. The owner of the shop who had been arranged by the designer to recieve my dress (Athena Bridal) called me Monday afternoon. I was busily running errands at work to get ready for an event we had yesterday and I missed the call and had a voicemail from her. It is probably a good thing she left me the news on the message, because I got really upset. Like, almost-threw-my-phone-into-a-brick-wall-while-crying upset.

House of Wu (the designer) "lost" my dress. It was made and ready to go, pending payment from Sharnett Bridal back in July. When Sharnett said they wouldn't be paying for it, Wu sent them to collections and my dress went MIA at this point. I'm guessing they sold it to a warehouse bridal place or something to get their money.

The Owner of Athena's told me they placed a rush order for them to make me another dress and the estimated date of arrival is August 20. That's nine days before the wedding. And that's the best case scenario.

I spent the rest of Monday and most of Tuesday pretty pissed off and sulking. I've come to terms with it now....there isn't anything I can do but wait so I've been distracting myself with getting other things done.

If I don't have this dress the Monday before the wedding....I'll be calling off work the entire week (instead of just the 3 days before the wedding) and finding one then.

I know the universe may be trying to tell me something here...but I freaking love my dress, and I won't give up on it until the last possible moment. Plus I'm hoping things will be smooth with everything else because I've paid my dues in the whole "weddings never go as planned" arena right?

Or I just won't care if the day of things go wrong, because nothing can really top all this BS....

Tuesday, August 4, 2009

Totally Awkward Tuesday: Horrors of the First Date(s)

Hosted by Tova! Go check her out!

Fiancé and I have been together for going on 4 years at this point and we are pretty much 100% comfortable with each other, but it hasn't always been this way. We were once an awkward new couple with more nerve racking moments than I wish to recall, but there are a few I keep tucked away in my mind, because of sentimental value, even if they were mortifying to experience.

My favorite spans two nights: the night before and of December 31, 2005.

Fiancé convinced me to drive up to his band's show in a small town about an hour from where I lived on the 30th. I had done the same a week earlier with a friend along for our first official meeting, but Fiancé and I had met up a movie alone between these shows and emailed a bunch so I was feeling okay that he wasn't some pyscho killer at this point.

The whole evening was sort of was loud while the bands were playing so conversation was kept to a minimum, I think I was introduced to one of his brothers and then he got asked if I was "his woman" by an aquaintance and he jumped all over that, "oh no no, this is just a friend" (side note: he had just broke things off with someone, it was a very unhealthy relationship, and I knew about it and this guy thought I was her but it still confused the hell out of me)

At the end of the night, he walked me to my car...where I somehow mustered the courage to ask him what he was doing for New Year's Eve. He said he wasn't sure yet, but was getting over a bit of a cold and didn't feel like partying much so I told him if he wanted to just rent movies and hang out at my place, that would be cool. He said he would let me know and then there was a very awkward handshake/hug thing that happened next and then I was in my car, feeling both mortified and excited at the same time.

So he comes over the next night...I had gone and rented a horrible movie (I won't name names, but it sort of created what many call Brangelina) so we watch it...and then its almost Midnight. I insist I always have to see the ball drop, mostly because I want him to kiss me, and we flip over to Dick Clark, the ball drops annnnnnnd.......nothing. We both sheepishly look at each other, and say happy New Year and then step outside for a cigarette.

I'm very very confused at this point...He took me the movies, insisting he pay, hangs out with me at his band's show thing all night, but then freaks when I get called his woman, sits through an AWFUL movie with me on New Year's but doesn't kiss me at Midnight when I insist we watch the ball drop....? What gives?

We come back inside and I decided to see if he wanted to watch another movie, just to gage his reaction and he said sure, so I think of my most guy friendly movies, and I come up with Baseketball, (one of my all time favorites) and he tells me how much he loves that movie (score for me). So we watch the movie...nothing too exciting happens but then it is over, and its about 3am and he says he should probably head home.

I walk him to the door and then we stand there and I thank him for coming and hanging out and he said it was fun and then we are just staring at each other and I feel more embarrassed and awkward than I had in a very long time and then I just go in for it...and stand up on my tip toes (I'm 5'8 and he's 6'2) and kiss him real quick. He says,
"Well why didn't you do that at Midnight??" so I say, "Um, I don't know...I'm the girl!" and he says "hey, its the 20th Century" and then kisses me again, and it was great, and there were fireworks, but all I could think as soon as he left was, no, actually its the 21st Century.

To this day, I've never reminded him of his inaccurate reference to the century, mostly because its not something he would remember saying, but I always will.

Monday, August 3, 2009

Wedding prep a go-go

I apologize for the wedding heavy posts lately...I know this isn't a "wedding blog" but 4 weeks out from W-Day it is damn near impossible to not babble about wedding related things. I'll return to my randomness sometime after Labor Day, with a pinch of quarter-life crisis talk since I'll be the big 2-5 a few weeks later.

So here we are. Less than a month before the wedding. Where the H did the summer go? For reals!?

This past weekend was wedding productive. Fiancé's mom, Kiddo and I went and chose fabric for the flower girls dresses. F's mom is a bit of a seamstress and will be making the dresses sometime in the next 4 weeks. She and I also sat down and went through her music collection to fill the gaps we had for wedding music. I had everything except the dance type stuff people like at weddings.

On top of this, Fiancé got his wedding shoes (hi-top Chuck Taylor's), I got my bridesmaids their dresses we ordered from Target online and we decided to get the marriage license tomorrow and then ring/pant shop for Fiancé and for cool cake toppers tomorrow night.

Things are coming together nicely, but I'm still really, ridiculously worried about having enough money for things. C'est la vie I guess.

I talked to the dress shop Friday afternoon. We were both under the impression the designer had my dress at the distribution center in Florida. We were both wrong in assuming this. My dress is somewhere between the States and China right now. When will it end?